Is Marriage Counseling Effective?

Get the scoop on Marriage counseling, how it works, and what it’s all about.

Learn more about this form of counseling before meeting with your provider.

If you’ve thought about marriage counseling, you’ve also probably thought, “Will this even work?” This is a great question.

Attending marriage counseling, also known as couple’s counseling, can be an anxiety provoking decision. It can feel vulnerable to trust someone with your relationship and to disclose personal and private information to a stranger.

Let’s break this down so you can decide if marriage counseling is right for your relationship.

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What is marriage counseling and what can you expect?
How does Marriage Counseling work?
Do I need to go to Marriage Counseling?
When is the right time to begin Marriage Counseling?
How long does marriage counseling take?

What is marriage counseling and what can you expect?

The marriage counseling process is provided by licensed therapists, including marriage and family therapists, clinical social workers and licensed professional counselors. These therapists provide the same mental health services as other therapists, but specifically focus on couples’ relationships.

Marriage counseling takes place with both partners and the therapist. Through the guidance of the therapist, the couple understands what has happened to their relationship and how each person has contributed to current problems.

Together, the couple sets realistic expectations of the relationship and one another and gain clarity about a direction for their marriage. They will use the couples therapist to help them achieve their goals, and manage conflict that may arise during their work together.

Divorce counseling and Discernment Counseling is also an option for couples to explore whether either partner wants a divorce or how to move forward after a divorce.

How does Marriage Counseling work?

The goal of marriage counseling is to change patterns of interaction, enhance emotional connection and improve communication between partners.

Marriage counseling teaches skills such as healthy communication, effective listening and managing conflict, which has been shown to reduce the risk of divorce.

According to the American Psychological Association, couples counseling is not only for married couples. Any couple, regardless of sexual orientation, race, gender or ethnicity can benefit from couple’s counseling to improve the quality of their relationship.

Is marriage counseling worth it

Do I need to go to Marriage Counseling?

Research indicates there are many benefits from engaging in marriage therapy.

According to research done by the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, over 97 percent of those surveyed said they got the help they needed from couple’s therapy. 93 percent of couples said they had more effective tools for managing their problems.

Improvement of communication skills and problem solving, taught in couple’s counseling, has been found to reduce intimacy issues and enhance compromise, kindness and honesty within the relationship.

It has also been found that less conflict and relational stress can improve mental health.

However, having more negative than positive exchanges between partners can diminish these benefits and actually hurt one’s health, especially for those who have been married for a long time.

Having healthy communication, a reliable partner and understanding in marriages can boost a person’s health, according to experts.

People who have completed couples therapy report improved physical health and the ability to function better at work after attending therapy. This is because research shows that people in unsatisfying marriages are more likely to be ill.

When is the right time to begin Marriage Counseling?

Every relationship has ups and downs, so it can be difficult to identify when to seek support. You don’t have to wait until your relationship shows signs of trouble to seek guidance.

In fact, research has demonstrated that couple’s counseling is most effective when couples begin sooner rather than later.

An article in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships argues that some problems that lead to unnecessary divorce may be present from the beginning of the relationship

Start by finding a therapist who specializes in marriage therapy. You may have to meet with several marriage counselors until you find the right fit. It’s important that both partners feel comfortable with the chosen therapist.

There are always many reasons not to start something like Marriage Therapy; cost, time, or even a slight improvement in the relationship.

It is important, however, that when one person is considering Marriage Therapy, that they have a conversation with a therapist to help determine if such therapy is needed, helpful, and appropriate.

How long does marriage counseling take?

Marriage counseling is often short term. You may only need a few sessions or you may need therapy for several months, particularly if your relationship has greatly deteriorated.

Couples typically meet with a marriage counselor once a week for an hour to an hour-in-a-half.

Typically, couples will meet with their therapist weekly, and both members of the couple will be present at all appointments. Once there is some improvement in goals, sessions may drop down to every other week, monthly, or stop all together.

It’s that simple.

Relationships are not easy and don’t come with a how-to manual. Sometimes couples need some extra support, guidance and tools to develop or maintain the relationship they desire.

Marriage therapy is designed to do just this. If you’re ready to make the changes you want and to