What is Sobriety? Is Sobriety right for me?

Going sober is not an easy decision. Before committing to a period (or lifetime) of sobriety, get the facts. 

With this information below, you can make an educated decision about what is best for you.

Table of Contents

(click below on a question to be quickly directed)

What does sober mean? 
What’s the best way to stop drinking?
What does white-knuckling sobriety mean?
What are the stages of recovery?
What are the 12 steps?
What is AA/Alcoholics Anonymous?
What is the big book?
How long does it take to be considered sober?
What do sober people do for fun?
What does it mean when someone says they are in recovery?
Is it okay to drink in front of an alcoholic?

What does sober mean? Does sober mean no drinking at all?

On their website, Merriam Webster has a few definitions, many involving limiting or removing drugs or alcohol from one’s life.

Wikipedia defines “sobriety” as “the condition of not having any measurable levels or effects from alcohol or other drugs.” quoting the World Health Organization.

Oftentimes, being sober is also associated with an individual that works a recovery program through Alcoholics Anonymous.

Thus, Sober at its core means not using mood-altering chemicals and finding alternative, and using healthy coping skills combined with a new way of living.

What’s the best way to stop drinking?

The best way to stop drinking is to first understand if drinking creates a level of unmanageability in your life, and if it has left you feeling a desire to make a change. Thus, the best way is to be honest with yourself. Ask yourself this question, “ Am I powerless over alcohol, and is life unmanageable as a result of this.” If you can answer yes to this, there is hope that you can stop drinking.

Research at Stanford University argues that AA is the best method for most people, and researchers with the National Institute of Mental Health report that healthy social connections is highly necessary for recovery.

It is also important to understand that each person is different, and some people do better in AA, while others do better in individual therapy.

What does white-knuckling sobriety mean?

White knuckling is a term used to describe someone that is attempting to simply not drink. This is also known as a dry drunk.

Someone that is not drinking, but continues to display behaviors associated with their drinking. For example, there is still a high level of irritability, dishonesty, and misery.

What are the stages of recovery?

The stages of recovery are often described below:

1. Pre-contemplative
2. Contemplative
3. Preparation
4. Action
5. Maintenance

1. Pre-contemplative:

An individual doesn’t see chemical use as problematic, and has no interest in in trying to achieve sobriety.

2. Contemplative:

In this stage, an individual may start to verbalize some problems with chemical use, and say things like “I should start to cut back, maybe my drinking is causing adverse effects in my life.”

This is the most common stage and can last the longest. As admitting this will go against the addicted mind set.

This is a good stage to be in, as you are starting to look inwardly and this will no doubt prompt change.

3. Preparation:

In the preparation stage, an individual starts to develop a state of mind and a plan begin a recovery from addiction.

For example, they might start thinking about going to AA meetings and will research AA. They might even start researching addiction, and ways to be sober.

The key with preparation is that an individual’s starts to recognize there is a problem, and will start to show behavioral efforts to make change.

4. Action:

Action stage has a primary focus of putting all the above mentioned stages into action. This stage will be the longest stage.

This is because the above stages are fluid, and nonlinear. Therefore, it is completely normal for someone to experience fluctuations in all stages above. This is what can lead to relapses, and difficulty maintaining consistent behavioral commitment.

5. Maintenance:

In this last state, the individual has started the process of making that consistent change, and will be committed to long term change.

These people in recovery from drug and alcohol addiction may also continue to attend support groups to stay sober.

These stages of change can also be applied to family members of addicts and alcoholics.