What is Codependency?: Signs and Symptoms
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What is Codependency?: Signs and Symptoms

 

 

 

Codependency is a problematic way to develop relationships.

Learn about this common issue people face, and discover ways to overcome codependency.

 

 

What are the signs of codependency?

 

The concept of codependency emerged out of addictions research. It was a concept designed to describe the behavior of spouses and children of alcoholics. Since then, the concept has been applied more broadly.

 

While there are a variety of definitions, a review in journal Contemporary Family Therapy used previous research to highlight key aspects of codependency, which are listed below. These can be considered “signs” that you might be prone to codependency.

-Holding an extreme belief that you are powerless, and others are powerful

-Not openly sharing your feelings

-Excessive emphasize on getting your sense of purpose by engaging in/caring for relationships that cause you distress

-Can involve denial, attempting to control the relationship, or being very rigid.

If these signs strike a chord with you then you may want to seek out help from a therapist.

 

 

 

What is a codependent relationship?

 

A codependent relationship is one in which two or more people feel responsible over things in their partner’s life that they should not be responsible for.

 

This can include controlling what another does or says, helping and supporting to a selfless and exhausting degree, and/or not being able to make healthy boundaries with others.

 

A codependent relationship is one that has the same signs outlined in the previous question. If you feel like you are in a codependent relationship, and you want to overcome dependency, then you may want to seek treatment from couples counseling or individual therapy.

 

 

 

Is a codependent relationship bad?

 

There is some level of dependency in every relationship, especially in parent-child relationships. However, as outline above, codependency tends to operate more in the extremes.

 

While is it s normal to at times feel powerless, if you almost always feel powerless in your relationships that is more concerning.

 

If you identify with the symptoms of codependency outlined above it may not be impacting your relationship right now, but it likely will down the road. Mental Health of America talks about how people who have codependent tendencies tend to end up feeling hurt when their efforts/work are not recognized by their partners.

 

A sign of codependency is also having your sense of purpose tied up in your relationship, which can lead to feelings of sadness or worry when things hit a bump in the road.

 

Considering all this, if you believe you are in a codependent relationship it would likely serve both you and your relationship to seek out individual or couples therapy.

 

Substance abuse is also a very common component of a codependent relationship as it puts at least one person in a caretaking position, and another in a dependency persons’ position. Addiction to drugs or alcohol inevitably makes the codependent relationship much more difficult.

 

 

 

What are codependent behaviors?

 

Mental Health America talks about how it is common for people who have codependent tendencies to have certain patterns of behavior including low self-esteem, which can lead them to look for outside approval/validation.

 

As stated above that may mean looking for worth or purpose in a relationship, where you can take a caretaking role. Some of the other behaviors Mental Health American outlines are:

-An exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others

-A tendency to do more than their share

-A tendency to become hurt when people do not recognize their efforts